Having moved from Illinois to West Virginia, Jeff and I decided to cash out of the small (very small) amount that we had in our Illinois Teachers Retirement fund, built up by our need to teach at the local community colleges to supplement our meager grad school income (although I am remembering that income fondly right now!). And so we requested the paperwork and sent it off to SURS and knowing government bureaucracy, expected it to take about 30-40 days. But of course we underestimated both the effectiveness of government and the ability of our right honorable governor of Illinois, Ron B, who will heretofore be renamed Zippy the pinhead. It all began earlier this week when I phoned said government office to check on our process, and was told that because of Zippy’s new law, all of the member benefits would have to be calculated by hand. I said BY HAND!!!! Maybe it’s me that finds in our world of technology and computers that calculating anything by hand is asinine. I mean what the hell did Bill Gates do for us if not make our life a bit easier with the advent of the computer. I don’t even calculate grades by hand, I have a computer program that does that!! I know that there are people who constantly complain about computers taking over and the inability of people to do even the simplest task without computers and this will lead to the downfall of society…blahblahblah…those people are communists. I am sure that there is someone (not me) who can hand calculate the distance to the moon (I repeat again, not me) but a computer can do it in.25 seconds! So why, in the name of God and all that’s holy, would Zippy require every retirement fund to be calculated by hand? Way to go Zippy! Way to alienate once again the people who put you in office!!!!!
Of course I should not be surprised at Zippy, this is the same man who ran on an education platform and then turned around and ignored any and all campaign promises that he made. Zippy was so concerned with teacher shortages that he cut funding to the public colleges and universities, effectively cutting funding to the places that turn out new teachers… is this logical? Then he makes the best announcement ever, that the state will stop matching retirement funds for professors for three…no five…no seven years!!!! All of this to the people who campaigned and voted him into office!!! Every time that I think about voting for this guy I must raise a first in the air in C-like defiance. But I won’t make that mistake again, believe me if the Illinois Democratic party is stupid enough to run this guy again I might vote republican, wait, I won’t go that far, maybe I’ll just abstain. Although on second thought I won’t be a resident of Illinois anymore, so I will just encourage others not to vote for him. It won’t be much work for my teacher mother, and I won’t even count my republican in-laws. But I will continue my crusade against Zippy until the bitter end!